Emily Jean Brockway - Online Memorial Website

If I could describe my mother in one word, that word would be…..Determination! 

Determined to overcome adversity and live a happy, productive life.

Growing up she played basketball and skied for her high school ski team all the way to the Idaho state finals. She loved Basketball…..she eventually became a huge Laker fan. She loved Chick Hern, a true legend.  

John Wooden Quote “If you go as far as you can see, you will then see enough to go even further” 

Mom went so much further in life than she, at one point, could ever see.  

She was determined to find her soul mate and start a family. She did in my father, and the rest was magical.

Over half a century ago, mom and dad vowed to love, honor, and cherish, in sickness and health, good times and bad, until death parts them. The two of them made good on those commitments every day of their fifty two year marriage. Dad made good on the most difficult commitments, and he did so without hesitation and usually with a smile on his face.  

She was determined to start a family. The plan was to build a family based on the principles of values, and cohesiveness. Doing the right thing is not a choice; it is simply what you do. To this day, I love my sisters and would not trade them for anything in the world. 
 

I am grateful for the gift of life! But for me,  more grateful for the kind of person that my mother was…….strong and determined ! My mother gave birth to four children, the last three still live. I cannot imagine how difficult that must have been for her and my father, through her strength and determination, she gave birth to not one, but three more children, and Donnie made the final team. Her strength and determination in raising a cohesive family played forward. I cannot remember, and can only remember, a home life that was warm, always comfortable and happy, and just plain…….fun!  

Mom and dad sacrificed for their family. Three kids, private school. Mom used to make our clothes, cooked dinner every night.  

I started T-Ball….sports, mom was a great fan. She and Dad went to every game for all us kids. 

Mom had a way with people. She always sought out the good ones. She befriended a woman by the name of Margaret Maleski who lived two doors down.  We called her Grandma, as she eventually proved to be the most wonderful lady, other than mom of course, that we kids had ever met.  
 
 
 

With regards to my friends, mom was intrusive as a parent should be, yet she was genuinely interested and always made the right friends feel like they were part of our family.

Houseboating on Lake Oroville! Mom was challenged to jump off the top of the boat. She was fifty at the time, and did it without hesitation. I was so proud of her, she was one of the boys ! That was the Tomboy that she was always known for.  

Mom and dads friends….I really liked them. Mom understood the importance of surrounding yourself with good people. 

One day I told mom I wasn’t going to college. Soon after saying that, cash flow became scarce; however an opportunity for me to make money presented itself. I have to tell you about the Dave Fullbright workday. I shoveled cow manure from 6:00am until 6:00pm. Soon after that day, I made it very clear to mom that my intensions were to go to college. That question never came up again.  

I graduated college…..mom was so proud ! 
 

Mom was never given the opportunity, financially, to go to college. Don’t be mistaken, Mom was well versed in current events, self educated, and to discuss these topics, you had better bring you’re A-game ! 
 

Call from Neta Hicks……..moms in the hospital !  Devine intervention ! Angels were watching over mom that day. Determination……………. 

Over the past 10 ½ years, the highlight for mom was the birth of her granddaughter, Sarah ! Mom’s smile was at its all time most beautiful.  

I received a phone call from mom, shortly after Sarah’s birth. She called and said “How’s my baby” ! I said “ I am fine mom, thanks for asking” Mom quickly said “No, how is Sarah….silly” ! At that point I realized that “My Title” had been replaced by my own child, and it felt wonderful. We now had that it common….Sarah had become to both of us, “My Baby” ! 

Mom’s favorite sound in the 21^st century was the sound of Sarah’s violin. When Sarah played, grandma smiled ! 

Sarah has been gracious enough to indulge is in the sound of her violin. Later she will be playing one of her grandma’s favorite songs…………Ode to Joy ! 
 

Moms last five years were tough, she dug deep everyday to find the strength to live the happy life she become accustomed to.  
 

Today….There is another ceremony of a friend of mine and previous co-worker

He was my age. My thoughts go out to his family, wife and stepchild. It made me realize that my mom didn’t leave us a day too soon. She lived a full life and is now free of the pain she suffered.  

Fibermialgia !  Finally a drug just federally approved this year ! This disease is real, please donate.  

Mom’s legacy on earth, for me, is this:

Through determination you will always persevere. 

Surround yourself with good people. It makes the good times great, and tough times, a whole lot easier.  
 

Did you hear the thunder last night? That’s mom! She has met with the powers at be (the decision makers) they have exchanged hugs and are now friends. She has been given free reign with a team of disciples to move around some things to make her new home a little more comfortable for her, and eventually the rest of the Brockway family, and of course, her friends. 

Anyone can be a mother, but it takes a special person to be a “mom”.

A mother can bandage up your wound,

But a “mom” will put a bandaid on the “boo boo”, kiss it and make it feel better.

A mother may hold you while you cry,

But a “mom” will cry with you.

A mother will usually listen to your side of the story before judging you

A mom doesn’t judge.

 

MY mom was just that…a mom.

 

She didn’t have a decent role model to follow, but she was determined to provide better lives for her children than what she grew up with. And without fail, she and my dad built a loving, stable home that was a haven to us kids, and the warmth was felt by everyone who entered.

 

Mom also provided us with confidence, morals and the value of family. All the things she did not have growing up. I asked her once how she managed to “break the chain”, and she replied, “Oh honey, when it comes to you kids, I go with my heart.”

And what a big heart it was. She loved us kids more than anything in this world, and none of us ever doubted that. But just in case, she reminded us every time we talked.

 

We learned that sometimes we had to share her heart with those she took under her wing, which was quite often. But she also taught us how to share our own hearts as well.

 

She also taught us the power of a smile. And she could light up a room with hers! And her laugh was contagious too.  There was always laughter and singing in our house. In fact, when I was 6 mom made me promise to sing at her funeral. Now, if she had passed a month earlier, a lot of people would have been in for a real treat! But while she was in the hospital I would sing to her to get her mind off of things, and one night she said matter of factly, “Honey, you don’t have to sing at my funeral.” I guess after 37 years of practicing she still didn’t think I was ready. But I was relieved and she knew I would be.

 

Parenting wasn’t the only thing mom was right about. She was right about EVERYTHING!!!

 

When I was a kid every Summer vacation was spent packing up the car and heading to Idaho, where both of my parents are from. I remember one summer we stayed at the Holiday Inn outside of Hailey. It was the 4^th of July weekend and we planned on watching the 4^th of July parade in Hailey after breakfast. Mom wanted to eat breakfast at the hotel there but there was a wait. After much persuasion, Dad talked her into going into town to have breakfast. We got into town and there must have been a biker’s convention because there were Harleys parked up and down the main street - - hundreds of them. I was in awe, but mom was not amused. Especially since we had tried every restaurant in town and there was a long wait at all of them - - except the Haiwatha Hotel café. Mom bit her lip as we entered the dining room, and bit it again after the waitress, who had hair down to her waist, leaned over her to pour dad’s coffee and her stringy hair fell into mom’s coffee. She bit it again (and shot dad daggers) when trying to remove her elbows from the syrup sticky table. However, it wasn’t until a horse (with rider atop) galloped in the front door and, right in front of the dining room and our table, plopped a steaming one right in front of mom. That’s when mom finally jumped up, flung her bag over her shoulder, grabbed two of us by the hand, and said, “that’s it, we’re outta here” as she stepped over the steaming pile. Once outside dad suggested they get donuts for breakfast but mom just pursed her lips and looked away. He offered to get sandwiches but again, she just kept her lips tightly shut and looked the other way. Dad finally got sandwiches and let mom do the planning from then on.

 

It seems that kids spend their 20’s avoiding their parents, their 30’s realizing that they’re not so bad, and their 40’s appreciating them more and more. I’m 43 -- I was just getting started. I wish I had more time to show her how much she was appreciated, but even so, there could ever be ENOUGH time.

 

I was lucky to have been able to spend the last few months with her, and in that time I really got to know her. The night before she passed, her last clear words to me were, “I’ll see you in heaven.” The five most beautiful words I have ever heard.

 

A few days later I woke up with a vision of her glowing, with a huge smile, holding a baby. I didn’t think too much of it until a couple of hours later, when something told me that it was HER child. I immediately told my dad about what I saw and thought, and it was then that I learned that they had lost their first baby a few hours after birth, and mom never talked about it because it was too painful. Now she is finally able to hold her baby, and she was glowing like a new parent would.

 

I know she’s watching over us because she told me she would. And after all, she is our MOM, and I could tell you that she’s resting in peace, however, I highly doubt she’s resting~~ but she is finally in peace.

 

I really miss her, and love her sooo very much...

 

…always.

William Penn once wrote: 

"They that love beyond the world cannot be separated by it.

Death cannot kill what never dies.

Nor can spirits ever be divided that love and live in the same divine principle:

the root and record of their friendship.

If absence be not death, neither is theirs.

Death is but crossing the world, as friends do the sea;

...they live for one another still.

This is the comfort of friends: that though they may be said to die,

yet their friendship and society are, in the best sense immortal,

because they are everpresent."

 

Mom was such an effervescent personality, one that drew you in with her smile, befriended you with loyalty, someone you always knew would be there for you.  Mom didn’t have a very cohesive childhood; she longed for a family that would embrace each other, and, when she became a parent, created that very family, one that loved deeply, and cared about each other more than anything else.

 

I grew up in this wonderful family, and have so many wonderful memories of my childhood, growing up with two fantastic parents.  I was, to put it mildly, the difficult child, the one that took every ounce of patience my mom could muster to raise.  I remember one day that was particularly hard for my mother. I was around eight or nine years of age, and, having discovered the joys of the eyeroll and the use of the word “whatever,” used it to full effect on that day.  After my brother and sister went to bed, I went into my parents’ room where my mom was reading.  I looked down at the book she was reading, Dobson’s book  ‘The Strong-Willed Child.”   I looked at the book, looked at her, and said, “You are reading that because of me, huh mom.”  She smiled, put the book aside, drew me into her bed, and told me, “Leigh Ann, no matter what, I will always love you, more than you can possibly know.”  That night we talked and talked, and, while it didn’t deter my behavior much, it did make me realize that no matter what I did, I had a place to turn to, two parents who would always be there for me.  I’ll never forget that night.

 

These past two weeks I’ve been thinking, How do we let a mother go?

How do we say “I’m ready now

to go on without you”?

How can we ever have a clue of what that really means?

 

 

And all of a sudden

The moment is upon us, and there’s no turning back.

 

And then we know what grief is,….

and guilt and love and things undone.

 

Try to prepare and we will fail in some way, be it subtle or looming….

 

But there is peace too.

Peace and acceptance and overwhelming love.

Waves and waves of conflicting emotion,

And laughter too,

and memories we hadn’t recalled lately

come flooding back in shared company..

 

and it’s all about you mom…

 

And there’s gratitude.. so much of that, that we had you, such a wonderful mother…

Bright and shining, nobody’s fool,

Independent, but humble too;

Smart, and kind, and fun.

 

And so very loving..

 

A part of you has passed away, but much is carried everyday within us, and will as long as we are here.

 

This may be a final tribute,

A day to celebrate your life and say goodbye,

But it’s not final.

Everyday I’ll celebrate in some way, just by the virtue of how you shaped my life,

The absolute and incredible fortune that I knew you.

As a mother, a woman, and a friend.

Leigh,

 

words cannot express how sorry I am for your loss.  Know that this stranger is thinking of you and has you and your family in my heart. 

Thank you so much for sharing this beautiful tribute.  I can see the love and joy in every word and picture.  While I am so very sorry for your loss, I am also happy that you all were blessed by such a wonderful person. 

 

Sincerely,

Monique

what a beautiful tribute to  your mom.  Your words really touched me, you mom was such a wonderful lady, I wish I'd have met her.  I'm so so sorry for your loss.  I pray God comforts you, and you gather strength for those around you who love and care for you.  We are here for you.

 

love,

Yvonne

Enrique, Marissa and Dahlia

Dear Leigh and family,

I'm so sorry about the loss of your mom. You've created a beautiful tribute to her and who you are as a woman and friend is tribute to who she was.  Her legacy will live on in you and I pray that encourages you. My thoughts and prayers are with you during this difficult time. Thank you for sharing this page with me.

Most sincerely,
Jen